Lone Black Spider

I just dont know what to do. The Scout group we are part of is planning their Week Long Summer camp. We have had a few meetings, in person, email and on the phone trying to decide what is going to happen.

At first we were going out of State, then that was too expensive, so we were staying local and now its back to out of State. Well, the main prob I have is of course, Money. It will cost me about $300. The troop is paying for the camp itself, but I would need to pay for transportation, gas and misc spending money for my son; like pop and stuff at the Trading Post. So $300 is a good estimate.

At the in-person meeting this week, I got bombarded w/a few people saying they would either sponsor me and or they know groups that help out w/funds like a Grant-type thingy. I gave in to all the pressue at the meeting, but now I am not happy. I hate, I mean relly Hate being a charity case. It eats away at me and makes me insane. I also like to take care of me and my son by myself as much as possible. I could get the money, but it would take away from other things, so I just dont know. But I have decided I am NOT going to be sponsored and no one is going to pay for this but me. errrr.

My son is totally aware of our finances and cant decide if he wants to go anymore either. There are many other issues too; like the X for one. Plus, there are some kids in the troop that really grate on both my kiddos and my nerves ( as in I just want to strangle them ). Plus, the drive would be over 10 hours! I mean really - 12 kids and about 3 leaders in a van, driving, for over 10 hours. and this is with out any electronic gizmos such as GameBoys! I try to put myself in my sons possition and I am like, yuck ! No Way ! !

I need to decide if it is all worth it is all.

sorry this post is so long….just me ramblin’ away….

XO

Well since the weekend is just about here, I need to figure out what we are doing. Oh yeah, we have a wedding reception. Mostly the receptions here are totally boring, but this one will be different; the theme is Pittsburgh Steelers. They are having the Steelers colors, and live music and a wet bar and oh how fun! I, of course, don’t have a date, but will make an appearance and take my son. It should be fun anyways as they are both good friends.
Plus, they are getting married because they want too and not because they have too, which is not very common in Utah, sorry to say. I am sure they will have kids soon, oh, perhaps in a few years time. She works with me so I am sure I will be getting photo birth announcements when the time comes. Kids are great. Most of the time anyways !

Well I got my new contacts in my eyes and they are a little anoying ! Feels like sand every time I blink. The lady said I might need them polished, but like I have time or money for that! So I will stick it out and see if my eyes will adjust to the new lens’. moan….

On our way back from running the two million errands we had today, we stopped at my Eye doc and picked up my new contacts. I have not had new ones for approx four years and my eyes have been really bothering me lately. Needless to say, I am excited to wear them tomorrow. I wear Gas Perm’s, not soft. Anyways, on the way home, I was thinking that I need to also make a teeth doctor appointment. I have 4 small fillings that need to be fixed. Okay, its the same with the eyes; have not been to the dentist in about lets see…..three years…? Not sure, cannot remember! My teeth are okay though, nothing hurts, but last time the dentist said I should take care of this now instead of waiting until my teeth fall out! Having good teeth are very important to me. Plus, I don’t like it when other people dont’ have teeth that look like, or aren’t close to a Beverly Hills teeth cleaning shine! eGads, one more thing to add to my list of To Do, but this one is a good thing as clean teeth equal fresh breath and happy people, meaning happy me!

We just found out that our wonderful Piano Teacher is leaving for New York City in a couple days. She got a gig at the Waldorf. She is a jazz singer, piano player and some classical piano as well. I am SO very happy for her! I think it is a great opp for her and she will have a blast. The bummer part is that we loose our teacher. She is beautiful dark haired french speaking lady that I have known for over 10 years, and my son totally loves her. No wonder, I do admit she is hot! But anyways, my son declared that he will not take lessons from anyone but her. So we have a delima on hand; to quit or to go w/her cousin as a teach. We got into quite a arguement and I dont really want to go into it now, as I am still rather upset. But we will wait a couple weeks, keep practicing and see what happens. Like always, I need to process the information before making a decision. XO

Well the snow finally stopped and we have now about 3 inches. I am sure there is much more near the benches and my folks house, and probably a foot or more in the mountains. I have seen many trucks on the freeway today (as I can see them from my office window) and it looks like they took their pickup covers off a bit too soon. Since we have so much snow out here in the winter, I know people that pile sand bags, salt and other heavy things in thier truck beds and then use a nice cover to keep the snow out. We also go camping a lot out here, shove the tent, chairs and the rest of the camping gear in the bed and then use a cover so that all that stuff won’t blow away whilst driving down the freeway. I love trucks, almost got one, but my Jeepster was more convenient for us.

It is a total White-Out Blizzard of Snow right now out there…. gosh, I love the snow, but really…I am ready for summer ! Its cold, wet, windy and miserable. I have no wood left for a fire either and I just want to wear shorts.

I guess I should not complain tho, need to look on the bright side. More snow means more water, less draught. I am sure there are more good points but right now I cannot think of any.

ugh.